|
This journal may only be viewed by Blog friends and users with the password.
- Enter password - Blog friend request |
|
This journal may only be viewed by Blog friends and users with the password.
- Enter password - Blog friend request |
|
i want to make meaningful friendships. i want to make meaningful art. i want to be meaningful, i want there to be a reason i do the things i do. sometimes i find it very hard to give a meaning to the things that i do, other than simply "for the fun of it" or "because it's the right thing to do" i want to feel as if i do things with a purpose; and right now it is a bit hard to find the purpose for the things i do within my life. i find myself very sad, with no understanding how to properly distribute this sadness in a constructive way, i am just so impossibly sad, and i do not want to cry about it any longer, as this is not going to help. well... actually i've love to cry about it, i would love to cry and pet my cat again, i cannot do this at the time being. i would love to cry and sob and be a disgusting baby while being held by someone dear to me again. however it does not feel like anyone is dear enough right now. everything is grey again, and i miss you. i think i'm still regressing back into the "numb" the grey, the "if i don't think about it, nothing bad will happen" the sad music once a month & then i focus on things more important for the time being, the whatever, the nevermind.
|
|
This journal may only be viewed by Blog friends and users with the password.
- Enter password - Blog friend request |
|
Hello,
The last few days have been incredibly boring; long too. I'm not sure what to write about during the summer. I've been working on artistic projects, working at my part time job, etc. I get home and I am far too tired to think about much of anything. I can't really focus on anything aside from my art commissions, so I am sorry there hasn't been much technological developments in my projects, both on here, and on my main website. I've been listening to a variety of music lately though; a sub-genre of post-punk I've found to enjoy is called "maidcore"...? Basically, you ever see the musical artist that named themselves after the fictional character Yakui the Maid? Others have done the same, or it's the same person under new identities. I like this subculture that has been growing in the last two years, it's a fun addition to my love of old internet communities, since these characters originated off of 2ch. |